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Gen. Chat “Thread for OB Parent-advice!” by Lindze

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fukkake 2 years ago on 03/14/12
Equipped: Cockblast of Vengence named "Crotchfire!"

Not that I have kids, but I am generally curious how you amazing parents deal with tanrtums? (My Aunt's kids are insufferable and when I watch them I kind of feel like putting them in a kiddie slingshot and blasting them across Long Island...halp?)
 
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Switzerland 2 years ago on 03/14/12
I always wanted to do the hold them till they pipe-down. Works well enough with the dog at least (not to compare the two, cause they ARE different).

http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/holding_therapy.html

Seems to go both ways from what I've been told.
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Scarlett 2 years ago on 03/14/12
Equipped: Home Pregnancy Test named "Too little, too late"
Ew, I could never do that. Physical force is just not for me, seems too violent. Something I'm hypersensitive about because of my parents.

When River is throwing a fit, I let her throw a fit in time-out. Even if I have to pick her up and put her there myself. It also lets me walk away and take a breather if she's being especially difficult. Honestly, what works for her and I, is just not acknowledging her fits. She can scream and yell and cry. But if I don't really acknowledge what she's doing, or I just talk to her like she's not screaming, she eventually gets, well, bored and then apologetic when she comes out of time-out.


NOTE: Teaching your kid not to move from time out is something really easy, but a different topic.
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Lindze 2 years ago on 03/14/12
Equipped: MapleTrain© brand Syrup
fukkake said:

Not that I have kids, but I am generally curious how you amazing parents deal with tanrtums? (My Aunt's kids are insufferable and when I watch them I kind of feel like putting them in a kiddie slingshot and blasting them across Long Island...halp...


you can do punishments like time outs and spankings, but honestly, when they reach that fever pitch, the best thing to do is try to ride it out and let things calm down, maybe remove them from the issue altogether. there's a reason why you see so many moms ignoring their kids when they're freaking out. i think they're just trying to not add to the craziness.
granted, I am super lucky and my kid rarely throws tantrums, and super rarely in public, and usually when she does I drop everything to focus on her and tell her to chill or we're leaving. usually it works, luckily. I feel SO BAD for people with kids who are higher strung.
its why i try not to judge other people with tantrum kids. I know I wouldn't be able to handle that shit (a slingshot would sound pretty awesome at that point) so who am I to say something about it?
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Major Tom 2 years ago on 03/14/12
Equipped: Espionage Codec named "C'mon, Snake, don't call me for no reason <3"
If I was 5 years old, I would definitely take a slingshot ride. That's like a reward, not a punishment!
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Madam GMILF 2 years ago on 03/16/12
Equipped: Kato Mask named "Ha! Now I am incognito!"
I was lucky and my kids seldom threw tantrums (if they did it was because of being over-tired or sick, generally), but what worked at home was if I just sat down next to them, and started making higher-pitched crying/whining noises louder than their tantrum. Usually shocked them out of it. Kind of like "waaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHH I caaaaaan whiiiiiiinnnnnnne betterrrrrr thaaaaan youuuuuuuuu!"

Never had to do this for more than 2 or 3 minutes - granted, it's a hell of a caterwauling and helps to have earplugs.

Or sometimes any different, distracting sound - doesn't usually work past the age of 3 though.
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fukkake 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: Cockblast of Vengence named "Crotchfire!"


Nicholas, who is at his terrible 2 stage, has terrible fits where he will scream and bang his head on the ground repetitively. The word no, only means something when he is with me or Mom because once he bit me pretty hard (got a nasty bruise) and we put him in my room, no TV, no snacks, let him scream until he was done, washed him up, and then put him to bed. Aunt Gina obviously does no follow through with punishments.

I guess ignoring the tantrum or trying to find out why they are upset is a good way to deal?

Usually I will let them have the tantrum or if we are in a store, even though it is a HUGE inconvenience to me and if I am able, I will pull him out and sit in the car until he is done. Most of the time we just go home and I will put him in a room until he is ready to come out and say sorry.

Did any of your kids bang their heads? I mean, that can't be good right?
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Madam GMILF 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: Kato Mask named "Ha! Now I am incognito!"
The head banging isn't too uncommon, but that's a little scary - might want to check first if the poor little guy is teething or has an ear infection. Pick him up so he can't hurt himself or at least make sure there isn't anything hard he can damage himself on.

Just found this: http://www.babycenter.com/0_head-banging_11554.bc

And maybe mention to your sister that you are concerned and suggest she take him to a pediatrician just to rule out something causing him pain.
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Lindze 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: MapleTrain© brand Syrup
Ive READ that banging their head is fairly common but it sounds horrible to me! I dont know what I would do if my kid did that. seriously, I just feel so lucky sometimes. I know thats not helpful at all, though. Im sorry you have to deal with that, Steph! (even if its just occasionally)
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Tender Roni 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: Home Pregnancy Test named "negative..."
Bella didn't bang her head but she would make a fist and hit her head with rage. She would bite her own arm too. Her pre-school teacher was so concerned that she called me and I told her that she had done that before. Bella only did it for a short time (maybe about 2 months). She was a late talker so I think she would get so frustrated when we couldn't understand what she wanted that she would hurt herself. We would talk to her with a calm soothing voice and kiss her where she hurt herself and that calmed her down and I think let her know that we were sad that she was hurting herself. Steph, is your nephew not talking a lot? Does he have a sibling close in age?
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fukkake 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: Cockblast of Vengence named "Crotchfire!"

He has an older sister. Arianna is 2 1/2 years older then Nicholas but she never did anything like that. She used to scream at the top of her lungs until she made herself sick but never banged her head. Which I guess is equally terrible. She has dropped that habbit now but with the little one he seems to be getting worse. Nicholas was a late talker and he talks now but man... I can't understand most things that kid ever says.

So I guess it makes sense.
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Tender Roni 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: Home Pregnancy Test named "negative..."
Yeah and sometimes the younger kid feel like they don't want to share the spotlight. They are little pressure cookers at 2yrs old, heck even Bella gets so frustrated so fast and has major attitude. Kids will test and try you to see how far they can take it with the drama and I think you guys are doing the best and just letting him cool down until the Hulk moment is over. Phases like these seem like they will never end but they do :)
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Creepy Stalker 2 years ago on 03/17/12
Equipped: N00dz of akanepanda
:)
 
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Switzerland 2 years ago on 03/18/12
fukkake said:

He has an older sister. Arianna is 2 1/2 years older then Nicholas but she never did anything like that. She used to scream at the top of her lungs until she made herself sick but never banged her head. Which I guess is equally terrible. She has...


Arianna use to talk?

Moderator fukkake Says:

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Tulip O'Hare 2 years ago on 07/08/12
Equipped: Giant Robot named K-Devil named "Big Brother Is Watching You"
Hi OB parents! I'm at the age where most of my peers can't talk or think about anything besides reproduction, and I now have a few friends with babies. As the childfree friend who doesn't want one of her own, but is still happy to come visit/hang out/help out wherever possible...

- What's the coolest/best thing/most valuable/most helpful thing I can do for my friends right now?
According to my college roommate (who has a 7-month-old) it's "hold this thing so I can do some stuff with two hands," haha.
(And according to the internet, being the safe-but-cool adult will be really helpful when the kids are preteens and teenagers, but that's more than 10 years off yet.)

- What's the worst/most aggravating thing?
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LostDecoy 2 years ago on 07/08/12
Equipped: Coupon For Free *unf unf unf*
I'm glad you asked this question because I'm pretty much in the same boat and am freggin' CLUELESS!

Considering I may be an aunt in the future since my sister is trying to adopt...know this can be years, but I gotta be mentally prepared.
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Boudicca 2 years ago on 07/08/12
Equipped: Lightsaber named "I AM the Dark Side, Motherfuckers!!"
This is so refreshing and awesome! When uma and I had our first all our single friends bolted because we became the 'family' and either weren't cool enough to hang out with anymore or weren't as carefree because we had real responsibilities and couldn't just go out on a whim.

Just BEING there is the best thing you can do and shows you are a true friend. Believe me, your friends with little ones will have people ditch them and seeing you stick around will be a huge deal even if they never say it.

The best things are visiting and hanging out when the parents need to be home with baby. Most valuable/helpful thing is watching the baby so the parent can go use the bathroom or get a shower. If the baby is really small, offer to sit with the baby while the parent takes a nap. These are really little things but being able to have 15 minutes alone in a bathroom is priceless when your baby is small.

Worst thing you can do? Telling the parent how they are chained to the house now and can't go out with friends anymore. They know they've lost some mobility.

Try to be patient if they need to bitch about 'baby stuff.' There's a lot of stuff involved in day to day tasks when raising a baby and griping about how this one store doesn't have the right diapers or setting up doctor appts being a pain may not be in your domain but they don't want you to solve the problem, just listen.



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Yvaine 2 years ago on 07/08/12
Equipped: Bento Box
^This.

Seriously the best thing when I was a new mom was having people willing to watch Joey so I could take a shower that lasted more than 2 minutes.

The worst thing is the "well my mom/dad tried x with me why don't you try it on your kid cause obviously it'll work".

Just being an ear really. Kids are stressful, times out are rare, ect.
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Kirei the Klown 23 months ago on 09/04/12
Equipped: Chicken & Waffles named "My baby daddy love him some Roscoes!"
I have a question!

I am starting a new job in a little over a month, and we will be trekking from Green Bay to Delaware so that I may do so. We plan to pile the cats, our essentials, and of course Lucia (will be 16 months when we do this!) and ourselves into our 1 car and make a drive of it - it will take about 3 days at 6 hours of driving per day.

We do plan to have as long of a "lunch break" as possible so that Lu might have a little extra leg-stretching time midday before her afternoon nap, but I wonder - is there anything in particular that we can do to make the trip more bearable for her (and by extension, the rest of us)? She's usually quite good with car trips but has never been on one longer than a touch over an hour.

Of course we will have toys, books, music she likes, and a laptop that can play DVDs (for as long as the battery lasts). This seems like a pretty good assembly of diversion... what do you think? Do any of you have tips 'n' tricks for longer car trips with wee ones of this age?

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