Snark

Age: 36
Gender: F
Location: Ann Arbor, MI

Joined: 12 years ago on 08/03/07
Last Visit: 5 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: None

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Snark is currently piloting SEEPING LEMUR with Nephlite

SEEPING LEMUR's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Affectionate Scissor
• Secret Blast Whirlwind

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support basically anybody who asks by improving their sexual power. Impervious to bad advice. We can safely say historians will eventually forgive the pilots for their role in Operation Heroic Hogwarts, during which most of Antarctica was destroyed in an effort to blow off some steam. Frequently, the pilots' parents have complimented the pilots' sexual health. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and nobody questions their dedication to dedication to asskicking.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Robot family provided a strict diet of old martial arts movies and beatings. Somewhat devastated by the painful goiter loss of some shitty cat while masturbating. At an early age, showed much promise for playing the piano, but struggled with with discipline. It was at the age of 6 that she had her entire body replaced by cyborg components. Spent the next several hours doing nothing in a seriously shady dojo. Each sexual yeast infection was a step closer to the sensitive touching that her parents expected from her.

Educated at Sweet Valley High where she studied economics, where it soon became apparent that she was the type of person that never gets invited to parties.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her debut fight against a kaiju was a completely insane affair despite "accidentally" killing her best friend. According to survivors, most of the city was destroyed and the rest was covered in blood.

Deciding to listen to everybody else for a change, she re-dedicated herself to partying like a true hero and has no fucking idea what she's doing.

"The thing is," says a classmate, "She'd be a lot worse at something other than this if she stopped being an asshole. But that's what makes a good soldier, right?"

Psyche eval recommendation: Needs more nipple touching.