fukkake

Age: 37
Gender: F
Location: Audubon, NJ

Joined: 12 years ago on 11/07/07
Last Visit: 16 days ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: None

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fukkake is currently piloting OVULATING BLITZKRIEG with DinoRawr

OVULATING BLITZKRIEG's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Dynamite Nippletwister
• Shark's Laser

DOSSIER: Job is is to insult Kaiju and supply courageous tax advice to other Jaegers. Impervious to melancholy. Certainly historians will eventually salute the pilots for their role in Operation Unstoppable Asshole, during which most of Atlanta was destroyed in an effort to blow off some steam. The only question facing these pilots, who are simmering with sexual tension, is this: can they take a huge shit on the Kaiju without fingerbanging each other first?

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Raised by fairly normal parents in the dangerous foothills of an average American small town. Existence was transformed permanently when goldfish were killed by an evil warlord. It was at the age of 5 that she had a sex change. As time progressed, she learned the techniques of flatulence. Each joyful moment was a step away from becoming a true sexual being, and was all that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Was accepted to Harvard despite being addicted to blowjobs because of having nothing better to do.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her first fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked crowd-pleaser despite infuriating nearly anybody that gave a shit. Thanks to her efforts, most of the town was destroyed and the rest was burned to the ground.

In the aftermath of the grueling Kaiju battle, pilot was angrily promoted to the newly-created title of Lord Not-To-Be-Fucked-With by the President of what remained of the world.

"The thing is," says her commander, "She'd be a lot worse at embracing my love if she stopped being an asshole. Ah, what are you going to do? Life is crazy like that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Just wants to be loved.