Honey Badger

Age: 31
Gender: F
Location: Marlton, NJ

Joined: 13 years ago on 02/22/04
Last Visit: 2 months ago
Type: Founding Member (Lifetime)
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

View all public photos... (10 total)

• You've viewed their Profile 12581 times

[current user isn't logged in]

Honey Badger is currently piloting SAVIOR KANSAI with squallsoft

SAVIOR KANSAI's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Three-Way Knife
• Penis-Mounted Knife of Knowledge

DOSSIER: Job is to unleash lightning-like offense intended to attack the Kaiju by fingerbanging their friends. Perhaps that one of its most famous moments of the war occured during Operation Magical Derelict when the pilots sacrificed many Shake Shacks in order to save a couple of beat-up Chevy Malibus. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and have an unequaled ability to eradicate some Kaiju emotions.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Homeless family provided a strict diet of grain alcohol and comic books. At an early age, showed much promise for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with boner control. It was at the age of 6 that she stopped being a huge pussy. As time progressed, she mastered the art of flower arranging. Each withering yeast infection was a step toward the kind of shit that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Slept with a village of hobos despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because sometimes life is crazy like that.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her debut fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked affair despite falling in love with the old lady down the block. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju that would have made the toughest hombre you ever met shit his pants in three seconds flat.

In the aftermath of the heroic but sort of misguided Kaiju battle, pilot was angrily promoted to bat boy for the Mets by God himself.

"Son, you, you can study the training videos all you want," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and you're completely drunk you better forget everything you think you know and react to the new situation at hand. If you don't, you're fucked. Believe me, this is one pilot who understands that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday.