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Buster Machine No. 1597
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About evilrob

Age: 47
Gender: M
Location: Norfolk, VA

Joined: 17 years ago on 03/01/04
Last Visit: 3 years ago
Type: Founding Member (Lifetime)
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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  • You've viewed their Profile 3874 times
Would You Hit It? Would evilrob?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“Hello. I have many bits. They are large bits. None of them spin in circles however. I work, I sleep, I sit around bored, stopping to occassionaly harpoon passing people or fanboys, preferably.”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm single.”

What do you do for fun?

“Uhm. Uh. Teach my kid interesting phrases, make AMVs, listen to music. Sleep. Harpoon passerbys for leisure.”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“I work on contract basis for an electronics firm.”

What's your dream job?

“Working in a record store that's got the John Cusack/High Fidelity feel to it.”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“Erm. It wasn't what I've done, really. I swear. Otakon X I was walking back to my hotel and uhm. some bum followed me around, and insisted on giving me a dollar. To the point that he shoved the dollar down my shirt. *more to story*”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?


What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“Friends, love, whatever. I'm open.”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“Just someone who's into people. Doesn't have a problem with kids. Mildly neurotic's even ok with me.”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“All depends on the person. Really.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“Eva, Chobits, Angelic Layer, Lain, Saiyuki, Hoshi No Koe (Voices Of A Distant Star), Tokko”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Indie rock, that genre of post-indie rock often mistakenly called emo, hardcore, alternative, industrial, yada yada. if it's not gospel, I'll listen. Tho I <3 the Cure.”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“Watching anime, collecting vivid hallucinations. Dreaming about anime I don't have time to watch. Buying people manga and having it mailed to them to prolong the suffering.”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“Otakon 08. My first con in 2 or 3 years.”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Gunbound, HALO, FF, Postal 2 uhm. Root Beer Tapper!”

XBox Live! Gamertag


Jaeger Assignment

evilrob is currently piloting PIONEER LION with yunie_ffx2

PIONEER LION's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Aggressive Battle-Axe Orgy
  • Womb-Mounted Punch

DOSSIER: Primary role is supporting friendly forces by improving their offensive capabilities. Classified whispers indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Erotic Magical, a plan to use an experimental, secret atomic missile to ensure struggle against Kaiju. As we all know that one of its most famous moments of the war occured during Operation Defiant Hogwarts when the pilots sacrificed several thousand schoolchildren in order to save some dude's record collection. One rumored drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will perform like a real pussy pretty much any time you even look at it. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are terrifying and nobody questions their dedication to general cleanliness.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Homeless family provided a strict diet of encouragement and gin. At an early age, showed much promise for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with potty training. It was at the age of 23 that he stopped being a huge pussy. Each sexual lesson was a step toward being less of an asshole that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Unlocked his inner unicorn at Sweet Valley High where he studied his own genitals for hours on end, where it soon became apparent that he was a once-in-a-lifetime talent.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a splendid crowd-pleaser despite annoying the shit out of nearly anybody that gave a shit. Classified intel indicates most of the city was saved and the rest was incinerated.

In the aftermath of the grueling Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to General by a guy that wandered in off of the street and was pretty much just into promoting people.

"The thing is," says his best friend, "He'd be a lot worse at everything if he opened up his hearts. But that's what makes a good soldier, right?"

Psyche eval recommendation: Can excel with a little love.

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