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Milkman Danpa

Buster Machine No. 1706
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About Milkman Danpa

Age: 43
Gender: M
Location: Monterey Park, CA

Joined: 15 years ago on 03/02/04
Last Visit: 7 years ago
Type: Founding Member (Lifetime)
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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  • You've viewed their Profile 3583 times
Would You Hit It? Would Milkman Danpa?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“And it's not so much I want to kill her. It's just I want her not to be alive anymore. Uh... I sometimes wonder if all women are this difficult. And then I think to myself, 'My God! Wouldn't it be marvelous if I turned out to be a homosexual?”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm single.”

What do you do for fun?

“I love to dance. Love music. Infatuated with poetry and spoken word.”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“I'm a freelance writer and troubleshooter. If that girl is trouble, I'm the one you call.”

What's your dream job?

“To sit back and have my money make money.”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“I gave a bishounen boy a backrub while he was nekkid in the tub at the first Yaoi-con. He was one scared kid. That faker. If you're going to Yaoi-con, then prepare to be yaoi'ed!”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Girls!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I just want a relationship”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“Low to high maintenance. Old Navy to Louis Vuitton. I'm real easy-going and flexible. I could probably get along with anyone.”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“They're hard, emotionally and physically. But I think it's narrowminded to conciously avoid long-distance relationships. If you will only date within walking distance, then you're going to miss out on life.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“Patlabor, Macross (all of them), Here is Greenwood, Gunbuster”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“I don't watch anime anymore. I'm a poser that just hangs out and pretends to know what you're talking about.”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“Pacific Media Expo”

Into games? List your favorites!

“I've played a lot of games: Star Wars: The Old Republic, League of Legends, Star Trek Online, World of Tanks, World of Warcraft, City of Heroes, and the list goes on.”

Jaeger Assignment

Milkman Danpa is currently piloting FEARLESS INFINITY with MPsy S. Thompson

FEARLESS INFINITY's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Fist-Mounted Mallet
  • Elbow-Mounted Needle

DOSSIER: Role is is to supply much-needed tax advice to civilians, even during the heartbreak of undercover brawls. Cannot be damaged by fire-based enemies. During the Battle Of Mexico, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to boost the morale of everybody around them while simultaneously displaying outstanding oral hygiene. One rumored drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will perform like a real pussy just when the pilots are starting to have fun. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are admirable and nobody questions their dedication to intensity.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Raised by loving parents in the tranquil foothills of New York. Existence threw a fucking curveball when parents were killed by an evil warlord. It was at the age of 5 that he had his entire body replaced by cyborg components. Each sexual lesson was a step away from the sensitive touching that his heart yearned for.

Mentored by the greatest Jaeger pilot of all time despite being addicted to blowjobs because of having nothing better to do.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a completely insane triumph despite impregnating everybody in the Western Hemisphere. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju a code name of "Ass Chuckle" which meant nobody really took it seriously, despite the fact that it was actually pretty tough.

Deciding to listen to everybody else for a change, he dedicated himself to square dancing and as usual, is really shitting the bed.

"The thing is," says his commander, "He'd be a lot worse at piloting giant robots if he hugged a puppy once in a while. But that's what makes a good soldier, right?"

Psyche eval recommendation: Promote immediately.

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