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DP2000

Buster Machine No. 1734
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About DP2000

Age: 34
Gender: M
Location: Charleston, SC

Joined: 14 years ago on 03/02/04
Last Visit: 3 years ago
Type: Founding Member (Lifetime)
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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  • You've viewed their Profile 7561 times
Would You Hit It? Would DP2000?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“Hey guys.”

What do you do for fun?

“sunbathe”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“Supervisor in a retail shop and I go to school full time”

What's your dream job?

“I really haven't got any dreams like that I'd just like to make some more cash.”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“Just last week I forgot to flush after I doodied and my Landlord brought people over to check out our apartment and they saw my shit in the toilet!”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Girls!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“Here to make friends only”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“I'm looking to meet anyone in the area who wants to play videogames or whatever.”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“They don't work, but phone sex is awesome/pathetic.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“One Piece and Blame!”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Southern Rock, hip hop, alt rock from the 90's and such.”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“I've been playing pokemon and reading fantasy novels when I'm not working and going to school.”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“Maybe DragonCon '10”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Pokemon, Settlers, CoD Modern Warfare 2”

XBox Live! Gamertag

“Matty Stoopy”

Other Online Gaming Info

“CoD Modern Warfare 2”

Jaeger Assignment

DP2000 is currently piloting SECRET ROBO with GentlemanHobo

SECRET ROBO's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Three-Way Boomerang Storm
  • Penis-Mounted Beam

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support basically anybody who asks by augmenting their weapons power. May be vulnerable to melancholy. The only question facing these pilots, who nobody has ever fucking heard of before, is this: can they fingerbang the Kaiju without fucking up each other first?

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Basically kind of hung out with monks in the dangerous swamps of Mexico City. At an early age, showed great aptitude for being a pickpocket, but struggled with with discipline. It was at the age of 19 that he dedicated himself to vengeance. Reluctantly spent the next several hours trying to get laid in a filthy youth hostel. Each suprisingly filthy moment was a step toward the bloody satisfaction that his parents expected from him.

Was accepted to Harvard despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because of having nothing better to do. With a fighting style that combined the sexual prowess of a scampering ferret with senseless levels of violence, termed "Ferocious Monkey Style", he soon gained the sensitive touchings of pretty much everybody.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a fucked-up affair despite annoying the shit out of basically everybody. This was achieved despite fighting a Kaiju that had absolutely zero friends.

When the dust settled after the heroic but sort of misguided Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to Corporal by his first grade teacher.

"Buddy, you can beat your dick to YouTube videos all you want," says one homeless guy on a park bench. "But when you're actually out there with the fate of the world in your hands, and somebody offers you a beer you better forget everything Mommy said and adapt to the crazy situation no matter how high you are. If you don't, somebody's going to get pregnant. And trust me, this is one pilot who totally gets that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Will perform if given enough gummi bears.

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