Leilani_h is currently piloting INTOXICATED PIONEER with Campster
INTOXICATED PIONEER's special combat abilities are known to include:
Orgasmic Bliss Jump-Kick of Desperation
Cheetah's Bash
DOSSIER: Job is is to supply helpful counseling services to civilians, even during the confusion of sexual battles. Classified scuttlebutt indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Resilient Freedom, a plan to use an unbelievable, ancient aggressive handjob technique to hopefully end Obamacare. May be vulnerable to alcohol. During the Battle Of Atlanta, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to remain calm while simultaneously displaying outstanding masturbation habits. One rumored drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will really bum you out just when the pilots are starting to have fun. Everybody agrees: these pilots are fun-loving and like nothing better than to smash some Kaiju feelings.
MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Loving family provided a strict diet of love and gin. At an early age, showed no promise for being a pickpocket, but struggled with with potty training. It was at the age of 23 that she swore revenge. Eventually, she totally failed to unlock the art of mayhem. Each sexual lesson was a step toward the kind of shit that that her sense of honor demanded.
Mentored by the greatest Jaeger pilot of all time despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because people figured the world was ending anyway, so who cares?. With a fighting style that combined the tendency toward inappropriate touching of a drunken sailor with unbeatable speed, termed "Invincible Elephant Style", she soon gained the attention of some homeless guy.
During one drunken night, she stole a Jaeger and her first fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked thing that legends are made of despite killing her copilot. This was achieved despite seriously fucking up a Kaiju with an unexplained fondness for show tunes.
Deciding to learn a lesson, she re-dedicated herself to attempting to pilot her Jaeger sober and are kicking ass at that, as we all expected.
"You, you can read the textbooks all day long," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there trying to save the Earth, and you have an unexpected orgasm you better forget everything you learned and react to the new situation no matter how high you are. If you don't, you might as well be playing for the Mets. And trust me, this is one crazy asshole who understands that."
Psyche eval recommendation: Needs more nipple touching.
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