domminess

Age: 34
Gender: F
Location: Cary, NC

Joined: 5 years ago on 08/22/08
Last Visit: 3 days ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 756 days from now

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domminess is currently piloting COURAGEOUS PASSION with Optimal Solution

COURAGEOUS PASSION's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Electric Missiles
• Ear-Mounted Flamethrower

DOSSIER: Primary function is to unleash surgical offense designed to upset the Kaiju by murdering their reproductive organs. Impervious to melancholy. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and live to take a huge shit on some Kaiju limbs.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Loving family provided a strict diet of love and beatings. Greatly devastated by the cyborg conversion of her favorite hobo lover at the age of three. At an early age, showed much promise for playing the piano, but struggled with with bubble farts. It was at the age of 19 that she had her entire body replaced by cyborg components. As time progressed, she learned the techniques of babysitting. Each grueling yeast infection was a step toward the triumph that that her sense of honor demanded.

Truly blossomed at Oxford where she studied martial arts, where it soon became apparent that absolutely nobody was ever going to give a shit about her.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her first fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked affair despite infuriating Whoopi Goldberg. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju with extremely low self-esteem.

When the dust settled after the grueling clusterfuck, pilot was reluctantly promoted to the newly-created title of Lord Not-To-Be-Fucked-With by a particularly gentlemanly hobo who wondered that all the ruckus was about.

"The thing is," says a classmate, "She'd be a lot worse at fucking up some fucking Kaiju if she opened up her hearts. But ya gotta love that. This is the pilot I want on our side next time the Kaiju attack!"

Psyche eval recommendation: May be unfit for duty.