MackDaddy

Age: 58
Gender: M
Location: Indianapolis, IN

Joined: 4 years ago on 04/15/09
Last Visit: 21 hours ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: None

View all public photos... (6 total)

• You've viewed their Profile 1506 times

[current user isn't logged in]

MackDaddy is currently piloting RUMBLING KANGAROO with TheCat

RUMBLING KANGAROO's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Smothering Kick
• Flaming Groin Kick

DOSSIER: Primary function is is to supply ferocious counseling services to basically anybody who asks, even during the heartbreak of desperate lovemaking. We can safely say historians will eventually forgive the pilots for their role in Operation Final Asskicking, during which most of Washington D.C. was destroyed in an effort to figure out what all of the buttons on the Jaeger's control panel actually did. The only question facing these pilots, who nobody has ever fucking heard of before, is this: can they destroy the Kaiju without slaughtering each other first?

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a good example of bio-engineering gone wrong. Father was a homeless man. Existence was transformed permanently when friends were kidnapped by ninjas. It was at the age of 19 that he swore revenge. Gradually, he learned the art of drinking. Each surpising yeast infection was a step away from becoming a true sexual being, and was all that his parents expected from him.

Educated in some homeless guy's alleyway where he studied Eastern religion, where it soon became apparent that he was the type of person that never gets invited to parties. With a fighting style that combined the gassy outbursts of a tiger with surprising power, termed "Ferocious Strapping Fieldhand Style", he soon gained the admiration of pretentious assholes everywhere.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his debut fight against a kaiju was a completely insane thing that legends are made of despite impregnating his best friend. This was achieved despite fighting a Kaiju that seemed to be addicted to heroin or something.

In the aftermath of the heroic but sort of misguided battle, pilot was immediately promoted to the general's dogwalker by that guy nobody really talked to but apparently had the power to promote people, so whatever.

"Son, you, you can read the textbooks all you want," says one homeless guy on a park bench. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and you have a dick in your mouth you better forget everything he taught you and adapt to the fucked-up situation even if you're pretty sure you're hallucinating. If you don't, somebody's going to get pregnant. Believe me, this is one pilot who has mastered that."

Psyche eval recommendation: May be unfit for duty.