TheColonel Buster Machine No. 20415
Leave a Comment
About TheColonel Age: 36 Gender: M Location: Grayslake, IL Joined: 10 years ago on 05/05/09 Last Visit: 6 years ago Type: Gold Member Paid Member Privileges: Yes Privileges Expire: 357 days from now
View all public photos... (4 total)
Contact InformationContact information, such as a Member's e-mail and instant messenger information, can only be viewed by other Members! If you're already a Member, use the login form on the left side of the screen, or click here to log in. If you're not a Member yet, why not join us and be a part of the fun? Did You Know? You've viewed their Profile 2425 times Would You Hit It? Would TheColonel?
[current user isn't logged in]
Tell Us About Yourself...
Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!
“There is only the Emperor, and he is our shield and protector.”
Current Relationship Status
What do you do for fun?
“Guns: shooting, collecting, cleaning.”
What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.
What's your dream job?
“Owner/Operator of a gaming store in Chicago.”
Who Are You Looking For?
Which gender are you interested in?
What kind of relationship are you looking for?
“Friends, love, whatever. I'm open.”
Do you think long distance relationships can work?
“Nightmare world populated by Gieger monsters.”
Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff
What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?
Into games? List your favorites!
“If the game was made, I've probably played it or at least know that it exists.”
XBox Live! Gamertag
Other Online Gaming Info
TheColonel is currently piloting
SLASHER SHOCKER with Kaziel
SLASHER SHOCKER's special combat abilities are known to include:
Dynamite Wedgie Tantrum Butt-Mounted Sword
DOSSIER: Job is to unleash furious offense designed to destroy the Kaiju by destroying their emotions. In the past, homeless men have heaped praise upon the pilots' oral hygiene. One known drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will really bum you out unless both pilots have been circumcised by the same doctors. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and nobody questions their dedication to lovemaking abilities.
MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Abusive family provided a strict diet of cocaine and beatings. Deeply devastated by the conversion to Islam of his favorite hobo lover at the age of three. At an early age, showed no promise for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with chapped nipples. It was at the age of 5 that he dedicated himself to vengeance. Each surpising fuck-up was a step toward becoming a true sexual being, and was all that his parents expected from him.
Slept with a village of hobos despite excessive body odor because of having nothing better to do. With a fighting style that combined the tendency toward inappropriate touching of a tiger with sensual speed, termed "Elegant Elephant Style", he soon gained the sensitive touchings of hippies. He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a splendid thing that legends are made of despite infuriating Whoopi Goldberg. This was achieved despite fighting a Kaiju with an unexplained fondness for show tunes. Deciding to listen to everybody else for a change, he dedicated himself to shaving his pubes and has no fucking idea what he's doing. So-called experts have described his combat aptitude style as "amateur ass-grabbing", while mostly everybody else has described it as "brutally effecient" and "some of the most heroic stuff since gonhorrea invaded people left and right." Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday. Geek dating and social networking for awesome people. Sign Up. Join OtakuBooty! OtakuBooty is where smart, funny, sexy nerds meet. Creating an account is free. Full membership is $4/month or $15/year. Cheap! Press People. Need material? Cover OB for your site, blog, podcast, magazine, or what-have-you. More info » Want Your Stuff Reviewed By OB? Just send us your press releases and requests to review your products.