SilentSporadic

Age: 28
Gender: F
Location: Boulder, CO

Joined: 8 years ago on 05/22/09
Last Visit: 4 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 24 days from now

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SilentSporadic is currently piloting VIRILE BEEFCAKE with Captain Goldbeard

VIRILE BEEFCAKE's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Leopard's Blast
• Golden Blast

DOSSIER: Role is to supply strategic offense designed to confuse the Kaiju by speed-humping their emotions. Everybody agrees: these pilots are fun-loving and nobody questions their dedication to intensity.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Raised by monks in the tranquil foothills of Hell itself. At an early age, showed great aptitude for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with chapped nipple. It was at the age of 19 that she had a sex change. Soon, she learned the techniques of sexual touching. Each erotic day was a step toward the true mastery of self-control that that her sense of honor demanded.

Unlocked her inner unicorn at Yale where she studied some crazy advanced shit... I don't know, lasers or something... where it soon became apparent that she was the type of person that never gets invited to parties.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her first fight against a kaiju was a disturbingly violent failure despite killing basically everybody. This was achieved despite fighting a Kaiju that had killed some pretty tough bastards in the past.

In the aftermath of the grueling Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to Corporal by by popular demand.

Jealous people have described her robot piloting style as "amateur ass-grabbing", while others have described it as "the kind of thing legends are made of" and "some of the toughest Jaeger piloting since my dad sexually dominated nipples everywhere."

Psyche eval recommendation: Could save us all someday.