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Buster Machine No. 22851
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About Heavyoak

Age: 31
Gender: M
Location: Conroe, TX

Joined: 10 years ago on 04/19/10
Last Visit: 3 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 305 days from now

Public Photos

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  • You've viewed their Profile 1545 times
Would You Hit It? Would Heavyoak?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“I started out as a geek, But now I'm an otaku-geek.”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm single.”

What do you do for fun?

“Sometimes I paper craft. I Play Runescape for most of the time.. I own and have beaten every LoZ game, I even have the unedited Gold Cart of LoZ: OoT.”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“I'm going to college right now, and I used to program freelance, along with some freelance webmastering/ web site management. ”

What's your dream job?

“To be the very best, like no one ever was. To catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause. I will Travel across the land, searching far and wide. for each Pokemon, to understand the power thats inside! POKEMON! ”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“I paint using oil paint.... and make 3d art.”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?


What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“Friends, love, whatever. I'm open.”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“A nice girl who can keep up with me and will understand at least half of what I say sometimes. A kinda smart girl, looks are important too, but I really care about brain power. ”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“Kinda a pain....”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“I like a lot of what Gainax does, mostly: FLCL, NGE, TTGL. I also like FMA, FMA:BH, Bleach, Rozen Maiden, just to name a few.”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Mostly j-rock, J-pop, The Pillows, Do as infinity, Dragon force, AC/DC, ZZ Top,The Beatles, E.L.O.,Pearl Jam,Smash Mouth,Guns N' Roses.”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“I collect figures,manga, anime dvd's. I've tried making anime in flash ( didn't work out) , and I go to conventions. ”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“I'm always at Anime Matsuri...... unless it's not near me.....”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Super Smash Brothers, SSB Melee, SSB Brawl, Halo, Halo CE, (both the computer versions), LoZ, Metroid, Pokemon, Super Mario games.”

Steam Nickname


Other Online Gaming Info

“TF2, Portal 2, Runescape (member), Spiral Knights, Dota 2.”

Jaeger Assignment

Heavyoak is currently piloting FERTILITY WILDEBEEST with kiratsukai

FERTILITY WILDEBEEST's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Bumblebee's Jump-Kick
  • Twitterpated Stomp

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support other Jaeger pilots by improving their party capabilities. Certainly that one of its most infamous moments of the war occured during Operation Erotic Rimjob when the pilots sacrificed countless psychopaths in order to save a single flower. One known drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will really bum you out if either pilot is Mexican, which is really racist if you think about it. Everybody agrees: these pilots are erotic and have an unequaled ability to explode some Kaiju limbs.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Raised by robots in the affluent foothills of Dayton. Life was transformed permanently when parents were fellated by assassins. It was at the age of 6 that he discovered bathing. Each joyful beat-down was a step closer to the triumph that that his sense of honor demanded.

Slept with a village of hobos despite being addicted to blowjobs because of having nothing better to do.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a delightful crowd-pleaser despite annoying the shit out of his copilot. Classified intel indicates most of the city was destroyed and the rest was consumed by Biebermania.

In the aftermath of the touching Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to Head Badass by his first grade teacher.

"Listen up, rookie, you can beat your dick to YouTube videos all you want," says one flight instructor. "But when you're actually out there with a dick in your ass, and somebody offers you a beer you better forget everything you learned and react to the life or death situation no matter how high you are. If you don't, everybody's going to think you're a pussy. Believe me, this is one soldier who has mastered that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Just wants to be loved.

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