Krissytokyo is currently piloting SPECTACULAR BASTARD with Rain Dog
SPECTACULAR BASTARD's special combat abilities are known to include:
Sexual Laser
Nimble Flamethrower
DOSSIER: Role is is to supply suicidally-insane tax advice to civilians, even during the heartbreak of undercover lovemaking. Classified whispers indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Secret Panty Raid, a plan to use an experimental, secret boner pill to hopefully end erectile dysfunction. May be vulnerable to melancholy. One thing is certain: these pilots are erotic and have one purpose, which is to take a huge shit on some Kaiju friends.
MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Homeless family provided a strict diet of encouragement and beatings. At an early age, showed great aptitude for playing the piano, but struggled with with potty training. It was at the age of 5 that she reached puberty. Each surpising moment was a step closer to being less of an asshole that that her sense of honor demanded.
Actually managed to finally make make a friend despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because people figured the world was ending anyway, so who cares?. With a fighting style that combined the lewdness of the toughest son-of-a-bitch you ever met with sensual passion, termed "Invincible Hulk Style", she soon gained the erections of nudists.
After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her first fight against a kaiju was a delightful affair despite infuriating her mother. This was achieved despite seriously fucking up a Kaiju a code name of "Ass Chuckle" which meant nobody really took it seriously, despite the fact that it was actually pretty tough.
Following the touching Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to the general's dogwalker by God himself.
"You, you can study the training videos all day long," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there trying to save the Earth, and somebody offers you a beer you better forget everything you learned and adapt to the crazy situation even if you're pretty sure you're hallucinating. If you don't, everybody's going to think you're a pussy. Believe me, this is one soldier who totally gets that."
Psyche eval recommendation: Can excel with a little love.
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