Dr. Gonzo

Age: 33
Gender: M
Location: Glen Burnie, MD

Joined: 8 years ago on 06/18/11
Last Visit: 6 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 481 days from now

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Dr. Gonzo is currently piloting DROWSY STALLION with OmNomCupcake

DROWSY STALLION's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Mustache-Mounted Arrow Thrust
• Spectacular Nippletwister

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support other Jaeger pilots by upgrading their sexual power. Classified rumors indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Unyielding Ragnarok, a plan to use an unbelievable, secret fried chicken recipe to prolong inflation. During the Battle Of Texas, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to remain calm while simultaneously displaying outstanding intensity. Often, homeless men have heaped praise upon the pilots' combat effectivness. One thing is certain: these pilots are seriously bad-ass and have an unequaled ability to punch some Kaiju emotions.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Homeless family provided a strict diet of love and religion. Existence was transformed permanently when parents were killed by creepy street artists. It was at the age of 19 that he stopped being a huge pussy. Reluctantly spent the next several seconds doing nothing in a secret basement. Each grueling yeast infection was a step toward being less of an asshole that his heart yearned for.

Educated on the streets where he studied economics, where it soon became apparent that he was literally drunk the entire time, twenty-four hours a day.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his debut fight against a kaiju was a splendid thing that legends are made of despite annoying the shit out of his best friend. This was achieved despite seriously fucking up a Kaiju that would have made the toughest hombre you ever met shit his pants in three seconds flat.

When the dust settled after the heroic but sort of misguided clusterfuck, pilot was reluctantly promoted to Chief Asskicker by his first grade teacher.

So-called experts have described his robot piloting style as "embarrassing weaksauce", while mostly everybody else has described it as "seriously cool" and "some of the most heroic Jaeger piloting since Mike Tyson invaded my ass."

Psyche eval recommendation: Promote immediately.