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ShakeNBake

Buster Machine No. 2580
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About ShakeNBake

Age: 37
Gender: F
Location: Escondido, CA

Joined: 15 years ago on 08/05/04
Last Visit: 9 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 591 days from now

Contact InformationContact information, such as a Member's e-mail and instant messenger information, can only be viewed by other Members! If you're already a Member, use the login form on the left side of the screen, or click here to log in. If you're not a Member yet, why not join us and be a part of the fun?
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  • You've viewed their Profile 6520 times
Would You Hit It? Would ShakeNBake?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“Rock that Roll bitches!”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm in an exclusive relationship.”

What do you do for fun?

“Elbow punching. Singing. Elbow punching while singing.”

What's your dream job?

“Sitting on top of the world, literally.”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Guys!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“Here to make friends only”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“The good kind.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Other Online Gaming Info

“Mind games.”

Jaeger Assignment

ShakeNBake is currently piloting MAGNIFICENT HAWK with hello eileen

MAGNIFICENT HAWK's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Murderous Staff
  • Ear-Mounted Shield

DOSSIER: Primary function is to unleash surgical offense intended to confuse the Kaiju by fucking up their reproductive organs. We can safely say that one of its most famous moments of the war occured during Operation Erotic Eruption when the pilots sacrificed several thousand psychopaths in order to save this one guy who turned out to not even really be that important. The only question facing these pilots, who are simmering with sexual tension, is this: can they explode the Kaiju without speed-humping each other first?

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Loving family provided a strict diet of cocaine and beatings. Life didn't really change much when nipples were fellated by assassins. It was at the age of 5 that she discovered bathing. Eventually, she mastered the art of mayhem. Each erotic day was a step away from the ultimate revenge that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Mentored by the greatest Jaeger pilot of all time despite a total lack of bowel control because people figured the world was ending anyway, so who cares?.

During one drunken night, she stole a Jaeger and her debut fight against a kaiju was a splendid thing that legends are made of despite "accidentally" killing her mother. According to survivors, most of the town was destroyed and the rest was burned to the ground.

Following the heroic but sort of misguided Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to potato peeler, first class by some motherfucker with a bunch of medals on his chest.

Experts have described her Jaeger tactics style as "amateur ass-grabbing", while mostly everybody else has described it as "completely dope" and "some of the most heroic Jaeger piloting since Mike Tyson sexually dominated my face."

Psyche eval recommendation: Could save us all someday.

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