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Buster Machine No. 2951
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About Ree_The_Tard

Age: 40
Gender: M
Location: State College, PA

Joined: 16 years ago on 11/05/04
Last Visit: 7 months ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 34 days from now

Public Photos

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  • You've viewed their Profile 8755 times
Would You Hit It? Would Ree_The_Tard?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“Im a jackass, but you probably already figured that out. Im also loud and obnoxious so if u dont like that then too bad!!”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm single.”

What do you do for fun?

“Sit in my room...and do nothing....YAY!”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“Just started Penn State at State College”

What's your dream job?

“To be a Writer/director”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“Women laugh at my penis...does that count??”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?


What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I'm here to stalk John Booty”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“A living one preferably”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“Umm theyre umm distancey”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“SLAYERS!!!! Berserk, Evangelion(duh), M.D. Geist, crap load of others”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Heavy Metal”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“SLAYERS!!!!!! And i like video games alot!!”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?


Into games? List your favorites!

“All Final Fantasy, Devil May Cry, Soul Calibur 2, crap load of others”

Jaeger Assignment

Ree_The_Tard is currently piloting COURAGE EMPEROR with Tenna

COURAGE EMPEROR's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Inappropriate Nipple Punch
  • Devastation Jump-Kick

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support basically anybody who asks by improving their sexual capabilities. Classified whispers indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Final Diddler, a plan to use a fucked-up, ancient fried chicken recipe to decisively end struggle against Kaiju. Cannot be damaged by sensitive caresses. We can safely say historians will eventually forgive the pilots for their role in Operation Unyielding Sword, during which most of Yankee Stadium was destroyed in an effort to relieve boredom. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and nobody questions their dedication to dedication to asskicking.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a travelling Gypsy. Father was a homeless man. At an early age, showed much promise for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with chapped nipple. It was at the age of 19 that he swore revenge. Each suprisingly filthy lesson was a step closer to the triumph that his heart yearned for.

Befriended a troupe of playful cats despite a painful recurring prolapse because of his immense determination. With a fighting style that combined the sexual prowess of the toughest son-of-a-bitch you ever met with drunkenly unpredictable power, termed "Elegant Armadillo Style", he soon gained the erections of perverts all over the world.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, his first fight against a kaiju was a splendid thing that legends are made of despite infuriating Whoopi Goldberg. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju with unmatched power and ferocity.

Deciding to rest on his laurels, he re-dedicated himself to partying like a true hero and are kicking ass at that, as we all expected.

"Buddy, you can read the textbooks all day long," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and you have a dick in your mouth you better forget everything you think you know and adapt to the life or death situation at hand. If you don't, you're fucked. And trust me, this is one soldier who has mastered that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Just needs cuddling.

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