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Scarlett

Buster Machine No. 3246
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About Scarlett

Age: 31
Gender: F
Location: Chicago, IL

Joined: 13 years ago on 02/05/05
Last Visit: 3 years ago
Type: Lifetime Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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  • You've viewed their Profile 12223 times
Would You Hit It? Would Scarlett?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“Hello. I'm Scarlett. I like candle-lit dinners, walks on the beach, hitting children in the face with wiffle bats... Just kidding, I hate the beach.”

What do you do for fun?

“I enjoy intellectual debat ...Hey, Star Trek's on!”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“I work at a game company. My job is better than your job.”

What's your dream job?

“Astro...NOT! Uh, game programmer? Go figure.”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Guys or girls!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I'm here to stalk John Booty”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“I tend to get along with just about anyone, unless you take things too seriously. Then you're a cunt.”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“I'm all about them, apparently.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“Cutesy, typical fangirl stuff. Adorable, right?”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“I will listen to everything once and most things twice.”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“BootyCon.”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Fallout, League of Legends, DotA, WoW, Tekken, Call of Duty, HL: TS, etc.”

Steam Nickname

“msskillet”

XBox Live! Gamertag

“Ms Skillet”

Other Online Gaming Info

“LoL, WoW, lskjdfksdjf.”

Jaeger Assignment

Scarlett is currently piloting ERUPTING TORNADO with CardCaptorWill

ERUPTING TORNADO's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Devastation Strike Flood
  • Quadruple-Headbutt Armageddeon

DOSSIER: Role is is to disable Kaiju and supply courageous counseling services to friendly forces. Often, experienced Jaeger pilots have been awestruck by the pilots' lovemaking abilities. One inconvenient drawback of this Jaeger type is that it tends to perform like a real pussy pretty much any time you even look at it. One thing is certain: these pilots are heroic and have one purpose, which is to destroy some Kaiju heads.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Parented by fairly normal parents in the idyllic suburbs of Tanzania. Existence was transformed permanently when goldfish were killed by an evil warlord. It was at the age of 19 that she dedicated herself to vengeance. Each joyful lesson was a step toward the triumph that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Found herself on the streets where she studied her own genitals for hours on end, where it soon became apparent that absolutely nobody was ever going to give a shit about her.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her debut fight against a kaiju was a completely insane failure despite killing basically everybody. Due to her actions, most of the town was saved and the rest was covered in blood.

Following the heroic but sort of misguided battle, pilot was reluctantly promoted to Head Badass by her commanding officer.

"People need to understand, you can study the training videos all day long," says one flight instructor. "But when you're actually out there with a dick in your ass, and you have an unexpected orgasm you better forget everything Mommy said and adapt to the fucked-up situation right in front of you. If you don't, you're fucked. Trust me, this is one pilot who has mastered that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday.

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