Cat

Age: 33
Gender: F
Location: Encinitas, CA

Joined: 12 years ago on 04/04/05
Last Visit: 9 months ago
Type: Lifetime Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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Cat is currently piloting LUMBERJACK BEEFCAKE with Culexies

LUMBERJACK BEEFCAKE's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Quadruple-Uppercut Overload of Enlightenment
• Leopard's Blast

DOSSIER: Role is is to destroy Kaiju and supply suicidally-insane counseling services to soldiers. At times, media pundits have envied the pilots' lovemaking abilities. One thing is certain: these pilots are admirable and have one purpose, which is to piss all over some Kaiju limbs.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Robot family provided a strict diet of daily swordfighting lessons and religion. Profoundly affected by the cyborg conversion of grandmother guys that really knew how to party, in her own way. At an early age, showed no promise for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with watercolor painting. It was at the age of 23 that she stopped being a huge pussy. Soon, she learned the secrets of flatulence. Each suprisingly filthy day was a step away from the true mastery of self-control that her parents expected from her.

Found herself at Yale where she studied economics, where it soon became apparent that absolutely nobody was ever going to give a shit about her. With a fighting style that combined the lewdness of a tiger with unbeatable brutality, termed "Elegant Tiger Style", she soon gained the sensitive touchings of perverts all over the world.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her debut fight against a kaiju was a disturbingly violent triumph despite annoying the shit out of the old lady down the block. According to survivors, most of the town was saved and the rest was consumed by Biebermania.

Deciding to learn a lesson, she dedicated herself to curing AIDS and is basically doing alright.

"Son, you, you can read the textbooks all day long," says one homeless guy on a park bench. "But when you're actually out there with a dick in your ass, and somebody offers you a beer you better forget everything you learned and adapt to the new situation even if you're pretty sure you're hallucinating. If you don't, everybody's going to think you're a pussy. Believe me, this is one pilot who understands that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Will perform if given enough gummi bears.