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StuntCock

FUCK COMMUNISM
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About StuntCock

Age: 35
Gender: M
Location: Atlanta, GA

Joined: 9 years ago on 07/22/05
Last Visit: 3 hours ago
Type: Lifetime Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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  • You've viewed their Profile 9467 times
Would You Hit It? Would StuntCock?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“I was born. I was unhappy. Now I drink. ”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm in an exclusive relationship.”

What do you do for fun?

“Act the prick.”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“I make violent video games.”

What's your dream job?

“President of making violent video games.”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“Some dirty mother fucker put shit in a grown man's pants. How messed up is that?”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Girls!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I'm here to stalk John Booty”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“Charles Bukowski or a reasonable facsimile. ”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“I hate you, Milkman Dan. ”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“HARD WORK AND GUTS!”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Music by obscure British bands that really haven't made a great album since like 1993, but I still keep buying their albums anyway, hoping that it will be as good as Mind Bomb. ”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“Is getting trashed off of bourbon and talking at length about why RIFTS is a shitty game considered a "gaming related hobby"? ”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“What is best at cons? To crush you animes, to see them dubbed before you, and to hear the lamentation of the fangirls. ”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Every extended rest I'm hustlin'”

Other Online Gaming Info

“Left4Dead, TF2 and CS:S via Steam. I've also been known to play a little bit of Settlers of Catan with charming OB members.”

Jaeger Assignment

StuntCock is currently piloting BUTTERED ERECTION with sykospark

BUTTERED ERECTION's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Leopard's Headbutt Whirlwind
  • Surreal Sword

DOSSIER: Job is to perform sporadic offense intended to destroy the Kaiju by pulverizing their children. During the Battle Of Sydney, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to fuck shit up while simultaneously displaying outstanding masturbation habits. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are smoking hot and like nothing better than to smash some Kaiju limbs.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Loving family provided a strict diet of love and tough love. At an early age, showed great aptitude for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with boner control. It was at the age of 19 that he had his entire body replaced by cyborg components. Each grueling beat-down was a step closer to the true mastery of self-control that his heart yearned for.

Truly blossomed on the streets where he studied some crazy advanced shit... I don't know, lasers or something... where it soon became apparent that he was a once-in-a-lifetime talent.

During one drunken night, he stole a Jaeger and his first fight against a kaiju was a delightful success despite killing basically everybody. Classified intel indicates most of the city was saved and the rest was full of ungrateful assholes.

When the dust settled after the heroic but sort of misguided battle, pilot was reluctantly promoted to bat boy for the Mets by some motherfucker with a bunch of medals on his chest.

"The thing is," says a classmate, "He'd be a lot worse at everything if he opened up his hearts. But ya gotta love that. This is the pilot I want on our side next time the Kaiju attack!"

Psyche eval recommendation: Needs more nipple touching.

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