Dyselon

Age: 37
Gender: M
Location: Los Angeles, CA

Joined: 14 years ago on 07/27/05
Last Visit: 18 months ago
Type: Lifetime Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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Dyselon is currently piloting FLAMING BULL with Kyuuketsuki Miyu

FLAMING BULL's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Damnation Pound
• Hawk's Dildo

DOSSIER: Role is is to annihilate Kaiju and supply suicidally-insane tax advice to other Jaeger pilots. Top-secret whispers indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Resilient Rumble, a plan to use a game-changing, ancient atomic missile to prolong this war for human survival. Certainly that one of its most infamous moments of the war occured during Operation Magical Panty Raid when the pilots sacrificed a whole bunch of psychopaths in order to save this one guy who turned out to not even really be that important. One rumored drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will blind everybody in a one-mile radius, pretty much ruining their lives, just when the pilots are starting to have fun. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are fun-loving and have one purpose, which is to smash some Kaiju genitals.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a famous CEO. Father was prone to fits of melancholy. At an early age, showed much promise for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with drinking more than two or three beers without acting like an asshole.. It was at the age of 19 that he swore revenge. Spent the next several hours fighting for survival in a secret gay bath house. Each suprisingly filthy lesson was a step toward the ultimate revenge that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Played first base for the Mets despite being completely blind because of having nothing better to do.

During one drunken night, he stole a Jaeger and his debut fight against a kaiju was a delightful thing that legends are made of despite annoying the shit out of a bunch of nerds. According to survivors, most of the town was saved and the rest was pretty happy about it.

Deciding to listen to everybody else for a change, he dedicated himself to opening his hearts to change and has been making some pretty good progress.

"The thing is," says his commander, "He'd be a lot worse at something other than this if he stopped being an asshole. But ya gotta love that. This is the pilot I want on our side next time the Kaiju attack!"

Psyche eval recommendation: Just wants to be loved.