diavana

Age: 36
Gender: F
Location: Long Beach, CA

Joined: 14 years ago on 08/13/05
Last Visit: 5 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 404 days from now

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diavana is currently piloting VIOLENCE FACEPUNCHER with SpeedBrkr

VIOLENCE FACEPUNCHER's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Satisfaction Kick
• Overly-Elaborate Boomerang Eruption of Retribution

DOSSIER: Primary role is supporting civilians by augmenting their offensive capabilities. Classified scuttlebutt indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Flagrant Sword, a plan to use a fucked-up, ancient doomsday device to decisively end the designated hitter rule. May be vulnerable to melancholy. Perhaps that one of its most infamous moments of the war occured during Operation Highway Storm when the pilots sacrificed several hundred cancer patients in order to save some dude's record collection. In the past, other Jaeger pilots have envied the pilots' ability to chug a six-pack. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are smoking hot and nobody questions their dedication to dedication to asskicking.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a secretary. Father was a brillian scientist. Somewhat aroused by the murder of father at the age of three. At an early age, showed much promise for not being a total fuck-up, but struggled with with discipline. It was at the age of 23 that she stopped being a huge pussy. Reluctantly spent the next several hours doing nothing in a secret waterfall. Each suprisingly filthy fuck-up was a step away from being less of an asshole that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Truly blossomed at the school of hard knocks where she studied forbidden knowledge, where it soon became apparent that she was the type of person that never gets invited to parties. With a fighting style that combined the sexual prowess of the toughest son-of-a-bitch you ever met with sizzling power, termed "Invincible Bastard Style", she soon gained the admiration of some homeless guy.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her first fight against a kaiju was a fucked-up thing that legends are made of despite "accidentally" killing her best friend. Classified intel indicates most of the city was saved and the rest was pretty fucked-up to begin with so who cares really.

In the aftermath of the touching clusterfuck, pilot was reluctantly promoted to Corporal by her commanding officer.

"Listen up, rookie, you can read the textbooks all you want," says one flight instructor. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and somebody offers you a beer you better forget everything you learned and react to the crazy situation even if you're pretty sure you're hallucinating. If you don't, basically everybody is going to die. Trust me, this is one crazy asshole who totally gets that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Will perform if given enough gummi bears.