Bob Ross

Age: 78
Gender: M
Location: Muncie, IN

Joined: 14 years ago on 03/21/06
Last Visit: 4 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 26 days from now

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Bob Ross is currently piloting ATOMIC SLAYER with Lovelyangel

ATOMIC SLAYER's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Supple Bodycheck
• Atomic Blast

DOSSIER: Role is to unleash sporadic offense intended to insult the Kaiju by fucking up their feelings. Cannot be damaged by gentle Kaiju. Certainly historians will eventually celebrate the pilots for their role in Operation Secret Magical, during which most of Philadelphia was destroyed in an effort to figure out what all of the buttons on the Jaeger's control panel actually did. One inconvenient drawback of this Jaeger type is that it may explode randomly, killing everybody inside, pretty much any time you even look at it. One thing is certain: these pilots are smoking hot and live to punch some Kaiju children.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Robot family provided a strict diet of cocaine and tough love. Somewhat affected by the conversion to Islam of grandmother at the age of three. At an early age, showed much promise for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with not slaughtering literally every living being he encountered. It was at the age of 23 that he swore revenge. Reluctantly spent the next several seconds fighting for survival in a hidden comic book store. Each withering day was a step toward the bloody satisfaction that his heart yearned for.

Became high school valedictorian despite a total lack of bowel control because of having nothing better to do.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, his first fight against a kaiju was a completely insane triumph despite falling in love with his mother. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju with an unexplained fondness for show tunes.

Following the grueling clusterfuck, pilot was angrily promoted to potato peeler, first class by a guy that wandered in off of the street and was pretty much just into promoting people.

"The thing is," says his commander, "He'd be a lot better at not completely getting the shit kicked out of him if he stopped being an asshole. But ya gotta love that. This is the pilot I want on our side next time the Kaiju attack!"

Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday.