Last Symphony

Age: 32
Gender: F
Location: Philadelphia, PA

Joined: 13 years ago on 04/15/06
Last Visit: 5 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: None

View all public photos... (9 total)

• You've viewed their Profile 7717 times

[current user isn't logged in]

Last Symphony is currently piloting VOLCANO CHEETAH with Butterflydidit

VOLCANO CHEETAH's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Pulsating Chop Tantrum
• Audacious Butt Punch

DOSSIER: Primary function is is to insult Kaiju and supply helpful blowjobs to friendly forces. Classified scuttlebutt indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Magical Rumble, a plan to use an experimental, ancient nuclear weapon to decisively end Obamacare. May be vulnerable to party drugs. During the Battle Of Los Angeles, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to yell like a motherfucker while simultaneously displaying outstanding lovemaking abilities. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and nobody questions their dedication to choice of personal grooming habits.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Abusive family provided a strict diet of organic vegetables and intellectual stimulation. Existence was transformed permanently when friends were kidnapped by jealous bitches. It was at the age of 5 that she dedicated herself to vengeance. Reluctantly spent the next several seconds doing nothing in a hidden temple. Each erotic day was a step away from the sensitive touching that her parents expected from her.

Unlocked her inner unicorn in some homeless guy's alleyway where she studied astrophysics, where it soon became apparent that absolutely nobody was ever going to give a shit about her. With a fighting style that combined the speed of a bull with depressingly inconsistent levels of violence, termed "Invincible Elephant Style", she soon gained the attention of nudists.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, her first fight against a kaiju was a splendid crowd-pleaser despite annoying the shit out of her mother. Classified intel indicates most of the city was destroyed and the rest was covered in blood.

When the dust settled after the grueling clusterfuck, pilot was angrily promoted to the general's dogwalker by pretty much the only other person that was still alive.

Experts have described her Jaeger tactics style as "weak-ass dick-slapping", while people who actually know what she's talking about have described it as "basically her new religion" and "some of the toughest Jaeger piloting since Bruce Lee sexually dominated your mom."

Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday.