Princess Shoujo Maiku

Age: 31
Gender: M
Location: Bellmore, NY

Joined: 11 years ago on 10/08/06
Last Visit: 9 days ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: None

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Princess Shoujo Maiku is currently piloting INTOXICATED HUNK with Mark Argent

INTOXICATED HUNK's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Despair Haymaker
• Gassy Bodycheck

DOSSIER: Role is is to supply helpful tax advice to soldiers, even during the heartbreak of high-speed brawls. We can safely say that one of its most infamous moments of the war occured during Operation Secret Asskicking when the pilots sacrificed nearly all of the Earth's homeless drunks in order to save this one guy who turned out to not even really be that important. Everybody agrees: these pilots are smoking hot and nobody questions their dedication to dedication to partying.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a migrant worker. Father was a terrifying cyborg. Greatly aroused by the Kaiju murder of father at the age of three. At an early age, showed much promise for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with drinking more than two or three beers without acting like an asshole. It was at the age of 23 that he dedicated himself to vengeance. Soon, he mastered the techniques of mayhem. Each erotic beat-down was a step away from being less of an asshole that that his sense of honor demanded.

Schooled at Stanford where he studied hand-to-hand combat, where it soon became apparent that he was the type of person that never gets invited to parties. With a fighting style that combined the speed of a seasoned expert with never-before-seen brutality, termed "Invincible Falcon Style", he soon gained the praise of his master.

During one drunken night, he stole a Jaeger and his debut fight against a kaiju was a delightful crowd-pleaser despite annoying the shit out of his mother. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju that had absolutely zero friends.

Refusing to listen to everybody else for a change, he dedicated himself to experimenting with foreplay instead of jumping right into "the good stuff" and has no fucking idea what he's doing.

Experts have described his combat aptitude style as "weak-ass weaksauce", while people who actually know what he's talking about have described it as "basically his new religion" and "some of the most heroic mayhem since gonhorrea sexually dominated my face."

Psyche eval recommendation: May be unfit for duty.