MaxJenius

Age: 37
Gender: M
Location: ,

Joined: 14 years ago on 01/24/07
Last Visit: 13 years ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 2143 days from now

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MaxJenius is currently piloting HAWK DRAGON with Miso Horny

HAWK DRAGON's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Diligent Hockey Stick
• Quadruple-Bodycheck Tantrum Seizure

DOSSIER: Primary function is to supply strategic offense intended to insult the Kaiju by fucking up their feelings. Everybody agrees: these pilots are admirable and have one purpose, which is to explode some Kaiju faces.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a travelling Gypsy. Father was a terrifying cyborg. Life threw a fucking curveball when goldfish were seduced by creepy street artists. It was at the age of 5 that he had a sex change. Each erotic beat-down was a step away from the true mastery of self-control that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Educated at Yale where he studied his own genitals for hours on end, where it soon became apparent that he was literally drunk the entire time, twenty-four hours a day. With a fighting style that combined the tendency toward inappropriate touching of a drunken sailor with unbeatable sensuality, termed "Elegant Bastard Style", he soon gained the erections of pretty much everybody.

He soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking his way into a Jaeger, his first fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked failure despite infuriating his mother. Due to his actions, most of the town was saved and the rest was covered in sexual fluids.

In the aftermath of the grueling clusterfuck, pilot was reluctantly promoted to Corporal by some motherfucker with a bunch of medals on his chest.

Critics have described his partying style as "amateur dick-slapping", while others have described it as "seriously cool" and "some of the toughest Jaeger piloting since my dad destroyed a bus-load of orphaned babies."

Psyche eval recommendation: Needs copious amounts of coddling.