Tsuki No Neko is currently piloting LUMBERJACK FACEPUNCHER with Suspicious
LUMBERJACK FACEPUNCHER's special combat abilities are known to include:
Multiple Machete
Sweaty Butt Haymaker
DOSSIER: Job is is to insult Kaiju and supply tricky counseling services to civilians. Classified whispers indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Resilient Nightmare, a plan to use a game-changing, truly astonishing fried chicken recipe to prolong this war for human survival. Impervious to party drugs. During the Battle Of Paris, pilots displayed an unprecedented ability to show no signs of last night's anal pounding while simultaneously displaying outstanding masturbation habits. One inconvenient drawback of this Jaeger type is that under very rare circumstances it will blind everybody in a one-mile radius, pretty much ruining their lives, unless both pilots have been circumcised by the same doctors. The only question facing these pilots, who nobody has ever fucking heard of before, is this: can they aggressively fuck the Kaiju without destroying each other first?
MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Basically kind of hung out with mongooses in the peaceful suburbs of Pittsburgh. At an early age, showed no promise for being a pickpocket, but struggled with with discipline. It was at the age of 5 that she had her entire body replaced by cyborg components. Decided to spend the next several seconds sleeping in a filthy basement. Each erotic yeast infection was a step away from the sensitive touching that her parents expected from her.
Played first base for the Mets despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because people figured the world was ending anyway, so who cares?.
She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her first fight against a kaiju was a splendid success despite killing nearly anybody that gave a shit. Due to her actions, most of the city was destroyed and the rest was burned to the ground.
In the aftermath of the touching Kaiju battle, pilot was immediately promoted to Chief Asskicker by some motherfucker with a bunch of medals on his chest.
Experts have described her robot piloting style as "embarrassing bullshit", while people who actually know what she's talking about have described it as "the kind of thing you jack off to" and "some of the coolest Jaeger piloting since Gen. George Patton destroyed Barcelona."
Psyche eval recommendation: Just wants to be loved.
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