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Honey Badger

Buster Machine No. 1414
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About Honey Badger

Age: 36
Gender: F
Location: Marlton, NJ

Joined: 18 years ago on 02/22/04
Last Visit: 2 months ago
Type: Founding Member (Lifetime)
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

Public Photos

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  • You've viewed their Profile 15989 times
Would You Hit It? Would Honey Badger?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“I'm waayyy to cool to be living in NJ, I'll tell you that much”

Current Relationship Status

“Seeing some people, not tied down.”

What do you do for fun?

“Gang bangin and hoe slangin. Oh and Dunkin Donuts too”

What do you do? You know- job, school, freelance sorcery, etc.

“What do I do? Well it could be you if you play your cards right.”

What's your dream job?

“maybe an archeaologist? think Indiana Jones”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“I can pee standing up.”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?


What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I'm here to stalk John Booty”

Describe the sort of person you're looking for!

“John Booty, but I heard he's kind of a douche”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“Wait, a relationship where you DON'T have to see them everyday? I don't see a downside, this question is bull.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“EVA, BlueSeed, FMA Brotherhood, Ceres, Bleach, Fushigi Yuugi, Bebop, Ninja Scroll, Nadesico,”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Mostly Rock and 90's music. ”

What are some anime/manga/gaming-related interests you have? Watching anime, cons, collecting cels, etc...

“Masturbating furiously to Alistair from Dragon Age”

If you go to conventions, what upcoming cons are you attending?

“Katsucon, BootyCon, and Dragon Con”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Lunar, Lunar 2, Legend of Dragoon, Mass Effect, Dragon Age, final Fantasy, the old LucasArts games, the old PC Sierra games, Star Ocean, DOA, Soul Calibur and WoW.”

Other Online Gaming Info

“WoW- Illidan and Shattered Hand (Aeclyn) Bloodscalp (Raielle)”

Jaeger Assignment

Honey Badger is currently piloting SAVIOR KANSAI with squallsoft

SAVIOR KANSAI's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Three-Way Knife
  • Penis-Mounted Knife of Knowledge

DOSSIER: Job is to unleash lightning-like offense intended to attack the Kaiju by fingerbanging their friends. Perhaps that one of its most famous moments of the war occured during Operation Magical Derelict when the pilots sacrificed many Shake Shacks in order to save a couple of beat-up Chevy Malibus. Everybody agrees: these pilots are drunken and have an unequaled ability to eradicate some Kaiju emotions.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Homeless family provided a strict diet of grain alcohol and comic books. At an early age, showed much promise for being able to walk in a straight line, but struggled with with boner control. It was at the age of 6 that she stopped being a huge pussy. As time progressed, she mastered the art of flower arranging. Each withering yeast infection was a step toward the kind of shit that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Slept with a village of hobos despite refusing to talk about anything besides collecting Pokemon because sometimes life is crazy like that.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her debut fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked affair despite falling in love with the old lady down the block. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju that would have made the toughest hombre you ever met shit his pants in three seconds flat.

In the aftermath of the heroic but sort of misguided Kaiju battle, pilot was angrily promoted to bat boy for the Mets by God himself.

"Son, you, you can study the training videos all you want," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and you're completely drunk you better forget everything you think you know and react to the new situation at hand. If you don't, you're fucked. Believe me, this is one pilot who understands that."

Psyche eval recommendation: Is gonna run this whole goddamn army someday.

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