Oleander

Age: 33
Gender: F
Location: Denver, CO

Joined: 16 years ago on 05/24/04
Last Visit: 56 days ago
Type: Lifetime Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: Never!

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Oleander is currently piloting BINGO PERIL with KitAdrian

BINGO PERIL's special combat abilities are known to include:

• Knowledge Headbutt
• Eagle's Headbutt

DOSSIER: Job is to support friendly forces by improving their weapons power. Classified scuttlebutt indicates this Jaeger is part of Operation Flagrant Ragnarok, a plan to use a fucked-up, truly astonishing doomsday device to end the designated hitter rule. Make no doubt about it: these pilots are erotic and nobody questions their dedication to sexual health.

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Parented by monks in the dangerous foothills of an average American small town. Life didn't really change much when friends were kidnapped by ninjas. It was at the age of 6 that she had a sex change. Each joyful lesson was a step toward the triumph that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Unlocked her inner unicorn at M.I.T. where she studied forbidden knowledge, where it soon became apparent that she was a once-in-a-lifetime talent.

She soon joined the Robot Army and, after sucking and fucking her way into a Jaeger, her first fight against a kaiju was a completely insane crowd-pleaser despite annoying the shit out of a bunch of innocent bystanders. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju that had pretty much no fucking clue at all.

Refusing to get a clue, she re-dedicated herself to experimenting with foreplay instead of jumping right into "the good stuff" and are kicking ass at that, as we all expected.

"Son, you, you can read the textbooks all you want," says one commanding officer. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and half of your robot is on fire and the other half is severely damaged you better forget everything she taught you and adapt to the crazy situation no matter how high you are. If you don't, you're fucked. Believe me, this is one crazy asshole who understands that."

Psyche eval recommendation: A rare blend of sensuality and passion.