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GentlemanHobo

Buster Machine No. 5619
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About GentlemanHobo

Age: 30
Gender: M
Location: Tucson, AZ

Joined: 8 years ago on 02/28/06
Last Visit: 4 days ago
Type: Gold Member
Paid Member Privileges: Yes
Privileges Expire: 288 days from now

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  • You've viewed their Profile 3730 times
Would You Hit It? Would GentlemanHobo?

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Tell Us About Yourself...

Say hello, and tell us a bit about yourself!

“I HAVE MANGE”

Current Relationship Status

“I'm in an exclusive relationship.”

Tell a funny story about yourself, or about something funny you own!

“My beloved bicycle is a Kona Ute cargo bike. Google for some cool pictures.”

Who Are You Looking For?

Which gender are you interested in?

“Girls!”

What kind of relationship are you looking for?

“I'm here to stalk John Booty”

Do you think long distance relationships can work?

“I'll stick with my near-distance one, thanks.”

Anime, Manga and Other Nerdy Stuff

Name some of your favorite anime and manga...

“Hare and Guu (!), FLCL, Serial Experiments Lain, Evangelion, mostly experimental or oddball stuff.”

What's some of your favorite music? What have you been listening to lately?

“Industrial/noise and IDM - Download, cEvin Key, Skinny Puppy, Einstuzende Neubauten, KMFDM, Squarepusher, Experimental Dental School, Gridlock, Haujobb, X Marks the Pedwalk, My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult, grayarea, The Bad Plus, Bootsy Collins”

Into games? List your favorites!

“Galaga, Metroidvania games”

Jaeger Assignment

GentlemanHobo is currently piloting SECRET ROBO with DP2000

SECRET ROBO's special combat abilities are known to include:

  • Three-Way Boomerang Storm
  • Penis-Mounted Beam

DOSSIER: Avoids direct combat and prefers to support basically anybody who asks by augmenting their weapons power. May be vulnerable to melancholy. The only question facing these pilots, who nobody has ever fucking heard of before, is this: can they fingerbang the Kaiju without fucking up each other first?

MOST RECENT PSYCHE EVALUATION: Mother was a migrant worker. Father was one hell of a guy -- had the kind of pecs you'd kill for. At an early age, showed great aptitude for being good at doing giant robot stuff, but struggled with with potty training. It was at the age of 23 that he had his entire body replaced by cyborg components. Reluctantly spent the next several hours training his guts out in a filthy alley. Each withering beat-down was a step toward the triumph that most people would stay the fuck away from.

Mentored by the greatest Jaeger pilot of all time despite being addicted to blowjobs because of his immense determination.

After becoming a Jaeger Pilot, his debut fight against a kaiju was a limp-dicked affair despite "accidentally" killing a bunch of nerds. This was achieved despite running away from a Kaiju that seemed to be addicted to heroin or something.

In the aftermath of the touching battle, pilot was reluctantly promoted to bat boy for the Mets by by popular demand.

"You, you can read the textbooks all you want," says one flight instructor. "But when you're actually out there fighting an unknown giant monster from another fucking dimension, and you have a dick in your mouth you better forget everything you learned and adapt to the new situation even if you're pretty sure you're hallucinating. If you don't, you might as well be playing for the Mets. Believe me, this is one crazy asshole who will never have any clue about that."

Psyche eval recommendation: May be unfit for duty.

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